Well readers, it is technically Christmas, so Merry Christmas.
I have to be honest...my Christmas is not super merry. I cried all the way home today. I miss my dad so much and for some reason Christmas is hitting me so much harder than Thanksgiving did. His headstone is finally done, so I'm going to go and see his final resting place for the first time since he was buried in June. Not the most uplifting activity for Christmas. Our home feels so bare without his presence and without the Christmas decorations he'd always put up.
So instead of getting lost in the sadness, I'm trying to focus on good things that happened this past year. 2013 was a shit year, but there were shining moments. As I listed to my all-time favorite Christmas song, O Holy Night, I want to share five of the things I can look back on in 2013 and genuinely be happy.
1.) Marriages. This year, two of my favorite couples got married. The love these twosomes share is the kind of love I hope to have some day. Their weddings were celebrations of their love and their personalities. I can't remember going to two more fun weddings. They are wonderful people and to be able to share in the joy of one of the happiest days of their lives were nights I'll never forget.
2.) Babies. Y'all, this was a good year for babies. My friends had the most beautiful identical twin boys imaginable. They were born a day before my father died and I remember showing him the photos of the boys...he said they were perfect, and they are. Their picture made my dad smile one of his last smiles and I'll never forget that look on his face. They are perfect. But with a hot dad and an even hotter mom, why would I expect anything less? My other friends had an adorable little boy. I love seeing the pictures his mom posts about him. It is so obvious how loved he is. He is very lucky to have the mom and dad that he has. He will be raised as a proper UK fan! And lots of my friends are pregnant. A new life is something to always celebrate and I am so excited for my friends who are expecting a new addition to the family in 2014.
3.) Healing. The day my father passed away a friend of mine's dad was admitted to the very floor in St. Thomas where my dad was. I am so thankful his father was rehabilitated and healed. While I am sad the same can't be said for my father... and a little jealous, if I'm honest, I am so grateful this man has the chance to meet his grandson, who was born a few days ago. While I mourn my loss, I am glad a friend did not have to experience what I'm going through. I am also thankful for the healing of people I'm not close to. A friend on Facebook's daughter has been healed of cancer. Another friend beat breast cancer. 2013 was full of miracles for some people and I need to remember that although my miracle didn't happen, countless others did. And I should be happy for them.
4.) Opportunities. I have been blessed with great opportunities at work. What could be better than having the chance to move upward in an organization that you believe in and care about? Not much. My friends have always had great opportunities. Although I am extremely sad, my best friend in Nashville has an amazing job opportunity in California. She'll be leaving in two weeks, and I will miss her, but I could not be more excited for her new path.
5.) Friends. In 2013 I said goodbye to some friends, hello to others, and nice to see you again to a few. As you grow, friendships evolve, and I am so blessed to have the people in my life that I do.
Although I am sad, I am also thankful for the things I have been blessed with. Merry Christmas to you and yours, and may you all have at least five things to celebrate and be thankful for.
Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Sunday, December 15, 2013
The Art of Ignoring Christmas
Greetings and salutations readers!
This time last week I was on the deck of a cruiseship, sunning myself. This week, I'm in my childhood bed at home, still nursing a cold, and cramped because mom's dog, cat, and my cat have all decided to sleep in my single bed too. But, I sure do feel loved!
This year, my mom has decided to ignore Christmas. We're not putting up a tree, we're not having a traditional special meal, and gifts we give eachother are not to be wrapped in holiday wrapping paper. I could argue, but I know when to pick my battles, and this is not one I am going to win.
When she first told me at Thanksgiving that we were basically ignoring Christmas, I was fine with it. Holidays have never been large productions at my house because I have such a small family. But now that I'm home for a day or so, this close to Christmas, and there is no sign of holiday cheer anywhere at the Stergas residence, I'm beginning to regret going along with her decision. I want to go into our living room and break out my old Christmas carols piano book, but I'm afraid it will make mom upset. I miss having a tree with our family ornaments to read next to at night. I miss the joy that usually comes with the holiday season.
I've tried to do Christmas my own way this year. I've sought out ways I can help families who actually do want a Christmas for their children, they just may not have the means to do it this year. I'm really excited for my friends' Booze Exchange party on Friday night, because that's going to be the extent of my Christmas cheer this year.
Instead of dwelling on all the things I'm going to miss about Christmas, let me tell you all about four of my most favorite Christmas moments.
1.) The trampoline. Okay, so at a certain age, most children stop believing in Santa Claus, or at least become skeptical of the jolly old man who supposedly comes into homes through chimneys, even if your house does not have a chimney. Supposedly reindeer dust disables security systems, or so I was told as a wee one. One year in particular, I thought I had this all figured out. I'd go to bed, mom and dad would assemble all of the Barbie accessories I'd asked for, throw in a few clothing items I immediately passed over, and filled my six foot (yes, six foot) stocking. I was an only child. What can I say? So I woke up on Christmas morning and played along with the whole 'Santa' bit. Because if you stop believing in him, he stops coming, and I wanted to most presents I could possibly get. Greedy, yes...but don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same. I read my letter from Santa in which he says what a good girl I had been this year, trying to speed through the letter so I could get down to business and assess how I'd made out this year. I get to the last line and it says 'look in the backyard.' I was perplexed as to what could be there. I saw the Barbie jeep I'd requested in the corner, so it's not like it was sitting outside. Maybe there is an injured reindeer I need to nurse back to health back there? I ran into the den, looked outside, and saw.... A TRAMPOLINE!!!!!!!!!!!! OHMYGOSHHOWDIDMYPARENTSSNEAKTHATBACKTHERE?!??!?!?!
Needless to say, Santa was obviously real. At least, for that Christmas.
2.) The year I became an adult. Don't worry male readers, this has nothing to do with any processes the female body goes through. It deals with the point in my life in which my six foot long stocking could no longer be stuffed with Barbies and video games. Determined to still fill the giant sock with presents, my father had the brilliant idea to fill it with printer paper packets because I was typing so many papers for school. At that point I thanked my parents for their valiant efforts over the years to fill my stocking, but I was relieving them of their duty. Getting printer paper is probably the 2000 equivalent of coal.
3.) The Jeep. One year I got a Hot Wheels jeep to drive around in and I knew the world was mine for the taking. I would cruise around my backyard for hours, chasing Scout, our dog, and leaning back in the driver's seat like I was large and in charge. I'd wear sunglasses even in the winter and I would pack myself a lunch (usually of dunkaroos and gushers) for the road, in case my journeys ever took me out of my backyard. Life was glorious, until two jerks stole my beloved Jeep and trashed it. Luckily, said jerks were not very smart and trashed it in one of their backyards and left evidence. Their mothers made them save up enough allowance to buy me a new one and present it to me, along with a letter of apology. I said I forgave them (to much oohing and ahhing about how cute I was and how sweet) but I totally lied. I did not forgive, nor did I forget.
4.) The last Christmas I had with my grandmother. Christmas of 1993 was probably the last Christmas I was truly naïve of how precious life is. Until that point I had never experienced loss, and it didn't dawn on me that people wouldn't be around for forever. We went to my grandparents house, had a meal, played with the awesome toy train my grandfather set up for me each year, and had a great time laughing and loving eachother. The next day at church we found out my grandmother, Mama Helen (or Gree, as I usually called her), had suffered a heart attack and was in the hospital. She would later pass away in February of 1994. That Christmas was the last time I felt like I had a whole family. Since that Christmas, I've lost my great grandmother, my grandfather and my dad, and my family has dwindled to two.
One thing reflecting on past Christmases has done is made me realize what I want in my future family. I hope to marry someone one day that comes from a larger family so I can experience the big family affairs. Someone with brothers and sisters so my children can have cousins their own age to play and cause mischief with. I hope that my future family will have enough people to survive losses but still keep the family gatherings a tradition. Obviously I'm in no rush to get married since I am almost 29 and have been single for a very long time, but one day I'll be ready. I am excited for the day when I have children of my own and can find ways to make Christmas a time of wonder for them. I'm not sure about this Elf on a Shelf stuff because personally, I think a voyeur elf is pretty darn creepy, but I'm sure I'll change my viewpoint if it makes my little ones smile.
If I don't write anymore before Christmas, enjoy your holidays and being with your families. May you all be blessed with good fortune in 2014. Be safe, be kind, and most of all, be happy.
This time last week I was on the deck of a cruiseship, sunning myself. This week, I'm in my childhood bed at home, still nursing a cold, and cramped because mom's dog, cat, and my cat have all decided to sleep in my single bed too. But, I sure do feel loved!
This year, my mom has decided to ignore Christmas. We're not putting up a tree, we're not having a traditional special meal, and gifts we give eachother are not to be wrapped in holiday wrapping paper. I could argue, but I know when to pick my battles, and this is not one I am going to win.
When she first told me at Thanksgiving that we were basically ignoring Christmas, I was fine with it. Holidays have never been large productions at my house because I have such a small family. But now that I'm home for a day or so, this close to Christmas, and there is no sign of holiday cheer anywhere at the Stergas residence, I'm beginning to regret going along with her decision. I want to go into our living room and break out my old Christmas carols piano book, but I'm afraid it will make mom upset. I miss having a tree with our family ornaments to read next to at night. I miss the joy that usually comes with the holiday season.
I've tried to do Christmas my own way this year. I've sought out ways I can help families who actually do want a Christmas for their children, they just may not have the means to do it this year. I'm really excited for my friends' Booze Exchange party on Friday night, because that's going to be the extent of my Christmas cheer this year.
Instead of dwelling on all the things I'm going to miss about Christmas, let me tell you all about four of my most favorite Christmas moments.
1.) The trampoline. Okay, so at a certain age, most children stop believing in Santa Claus, or at least become skeptical of the jolly old man who supposedly comes into homes through chimneys, even if your house does not have a chimney. Supposedly reindeer dust disables security systems, or so I was told as a wee one. One year in particular, I thought I had this all figured out. I'd go to bed, mom and dad would assemble all of the Barbie accessories I'd asked for, throw in a few clothing items I immediately passed over, and filled my six foot (yes, six foot) stocking. I was an only child. What can I say? So I woke up on Christmas morning and played along with the whole 'Santa' bit. Because if you stop believing in him, he stops coming, and I wanted to most presents I could possibly get. Greedy, yes...but don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same. I read my letter from Santa in which he says what a good girl I had been this year, trying to speed through the letter so I could get down to business and assess how I'd made out this year. I get to the last line and it says 'look in the backyard.' I was perplexed as to what could be there. I saw the Barbie jeep I'd requested in the corner, so it's not like it was sitting outside. Maybe there is an injured reindeer I need to nurse back to health back there? I ran into the den, looked outside, and saw.... A TRAMPOLINE!!!!!!!!!!!! OHMYGOSHHOWDIDMYPARENTSSNEAKTHATBACKTHERE?!??!?!?!
Needless to say, Santa was obviously real. At least, for that Christmas.
2.) The year I became an adult. Don't worry male readers, this has nothing to do with any processes the female body goes through. It deals with the point in my life in which my six foot long stocking could no longer be stuffed with Barbies and video games. Determined to still fill the giant sock with presents, my father had the brilliant idea to fill it with printer paper packets because I was typing so many papers for school. At that point I thanked my parents for their valiant efforts over the years to fill my stocking, but I was relieving them of their duty. Getting printer paper is probably the 2000 equivalent of coal.
3.) The Jeep. One year I got a Hot Wheels jeep to drive around in and I knew the world was mine for the taking. I would cruise around my backyard for hours, chasing Scout, our dog, and leaning back in the driver's seat like I was large and in charge. I'd wear sunglasses even in the winter and I would pack myself a lunch (usually of dunkaroos and gushers) for the road, in case my journeys ever took me out of my backyard. Life was glorious, until two jerks stole my beloved Jeep and trashed it. Luckily, said jerks were not very smart and trashed it in one of their backyards and left evidence. Their mothers made them save up enough allowance to buy me a new one and present it to me, along with a letter of apology. I said I forgave them (to much oohing and ahhing about how cute I was and how sweet) but I totally lied. I did not forgive, nor did I forget.
4.) The last Christmas I had with my grandmother. Christmas of 1993 was probably the last Christmas I was truly naïve of how precious life is. Until that point I had never experienced loss, and it didn't dawn on me that people wouldn't be around for forever. We went to my grandparents house, had a meal, played with the awesome toy train my grandfather set up for me each year, and had a great time laughing and loving eachother. The next day at church we found out my grandmother, Mama Helen (or Gree, as I usually called her), had suffered a heart attack and was in the hospital. She would later pass away in February of 1994. That Christmas was the last time I felt like I had a whole family. Since that Christmas, I've lost my great grandmother, my grandfather and my dad, and my family has dwindled to two.
One thing reflecting on past Christmases has done is made me realize what I want in my future family. I hope to marry someone one day that comes from a larger family so I can experience the big family affairs. Someone with brothers and sisters so my children can have cousins their own age to play and cause mischief with. I hope that my future family will have enough people to survive losses but still keep the family gatherings a tradition. Obviously I'm in no rush to get married since I am almost 29 and have been single for a very long time, but one day I'll be ready. I am excited for the day when I have children of my own and can find ways to make Christmas a time of wonder for them. I'm not sure about this Elf on a Shelf stuff because personally, I think a voyeur elf is pretty darn creepy, but I'm sure I'll change my viewpoint if it makes my little ones smile.
If I don't write anymore before Christmas, enjoy your holidays and being with your families. May you all be blessed with good fortune in 2014. Be safe, be kind, and most of all, be happy.
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
The Art of Loving to Cook
Hello readers!
I'm trying to forget the fact that I was on a cruise ship two days ago in 80 degree weather and now I'm sitting on my living room floor in pajama pants (pirate themed, though!), a long sleeve shirt and a sweater and I'm still cold. The fact that I have a fever probably doesn't help. It's time for the Anna-just-went-on-vacation-so-naturally-her-body-hates-her annual illness. This post is sponsored by Dayquil and Nyquil, which both knock my on my ass, as my five friends I cruised with saw when I was passed out on the boat most of Sunday and had not had a single thing to drink. But, I digress.
We had some amazing food on our trip to Mexico. We started and ended the trip in New Orleans where, obviously, good food is everywhere. The food on the ship was good for the most part, and even if you hated what you ordered, you could order like four other things in its place until you found something you liked. In Mexico I had the best shrimp nachos and guacamole of my life. It was a good week for food.
But even though I enjoyed all of the food, I missed cooking. I have always liked to cook, but in the past couple of years, it has really become a passion of mine. I frequently spend all of Sunday afternoons in my kitchen, prepping and making my meals for the week, since I know I'm not going to have a lot of time for cooking after work. It's peaceful to me. I love the sounds of roasting vegetables in the oven and the crackling of hot oil in the skillet before you put your ingredients in. I like chopping vegetables...when I'm angry or frustrated at something it's a great way to expend energy and do something productive. I don't so much care about the eating part though, which is weird. Most of the time after I have spent hours cooking, I don't even want to eat anything I made and end up eating a sandwich for dinner. I love the prep more. But my favorite thing about cooking is watching other people enjoy my food. I'm a people pleaser by nature, but few things make me happier than cooking a delicious meal for friends and being with them while they enjoy it. I love planning menus for full meals or even just a tailgate dish. I seriously spend hours combing through recipes, tweaking them to make them my own, and counting down till I can make them. Living alone, I don't get the opportunity to cook for others as much as I'd like. I plan on changing this in 2014. I want to have friends over for dinner at least twice a month. I want to plan elaborate meals I'd never cook just for me (even though I have done that on occasion) and enjoy time with the people that mean the most to me.
People often ask me what are my favorite things to cook. I have listed my top 6 go-tos below. Let me know if you want the specific recipes, or if you want to come over and have me cook them for you! Seriously, I would be so excited if people wanted to invite themselves over!
1.) Scallops. I have mentioned before on this blog how much I love scallops, but they are my absolute favorite. They are delicious and you can do so many things with them. They seem very fancy, but require very little attention: two minutes on each side and they are done and ready to be consumed. Sometimes I'll just use salt & pepper and some lemon juice. Lovely. Other times I'll make a saffron sauce to serve with them. I was playing around in the kitchen one day and ended up creating a champagne cream sauce I served over pasta with scallops that I need to figure out how to make again. I really need to write things down more!
2.) Salmon. Seafood is my favorite, so I cook a lot of fish. I know it's more expensive than chicken, but it's what I like, so it's what I make. A simple rub of brown sugar and Dijon mustard is a great, quick, go-to recipe for work nights. Also, mixing grainy mustard and sour cream makes a great topping for your salmon. Rosemary is a great spice to use too, if you're looking for something different than the normal dill associated with salmon. Seriously, there are so many options for this yummy fish, and it's super good for you!
3.) Roasted vegetables. I make pans of roasted vegetables every week. Broccoli with lemon, asparagus, balsamic green beans & mushrooms, sriracha & honey brussel sprouts...YUM. Roasting is super easy, keeps the nutrients in the vegetables, and give the outside a crunch while cooking the inside to a comfort food temperature. I haven't found anything that I don't like to roast yet! Maybe I'll try eggplant next since I really want to like it, but haven't found a recipe I like yet.
4.) Homemade pasta. Yes, it's a lot of work. Yes, if you don't do certain things right you'll have a glob of basically playdough on your table. But, if you do it right, there are few things better. One of my goals in life is to be able to recreate my dad's lasagna that he would spend all day making. My mom won't be my guinea pig because she says it brings back hard memories, but I'm taking volunteers!
5.) Pad thai. I make the best pad thai I've ever had. I'm sorry, it's how I feel. There's a place downtown with good pad thai and of course, the Smiling Elephant is delicious, but I really feel like mine is just as good, if not better, and it's incredibly easy to make. I have trouble ordering it while I'm out, because it is so simple to make in my kitchen.
6.) Meatloaf. We were talking about this the other day in New Orleans: there are few ways to make meatloaf look appetizing. I mean, who hears the word 'loaf' and is like, man, that shit is going to be fancy?!?! But I actually really like it, and enjoy making it something people want to eat. I make buffalo chicken meatloaf with large chunks of bleu cheese and frank's red hot sauce. I also make a really good turkey and cranberry meatloaf that is really hearty and a great winter meal. I think I like making meatloaf so much because you can just thrown a lot of random ingredients in a bowl, mix together, and cook it. Chances are, if you know the ingredients you're putting in the bowl mix well, you'll have a tasty dinner.
I'm serious friends, let me know if you want to come over for dinner. I look forward to having many of you at my place soon for great food and some laughs!
I'm trying to forget the fact that I was on a cruise ship two days ago in 80 degree weather and now I'm sitting on my living room floor in pajama pants (pirate themed, though!), a long sleeve shirt and a sweater and I'm still cold. The fact that I have a fever probably doesn't help. It's time for the Anna-just-went-on-vacation-so-naturally-her-body-hates-her annual illness. This post is sponsored by Dayquil and Nyquil, which both knock my on my ass, as my five friends I cruised with saw when I was passed out on the boat most of Sunday and had not had a single thing to drink. But, I digress.
We had some amazing food on our trip to Mexico. We started and ended the trip in New Orleans where, obviously, good food is everywhere. The food on the ship was good for the most part, and even if you hated what you ordered, you could order like four other things in its place until you found something you liked. In Mexico I had the best shrimp nachos and guacamole of my life. It was a good week for food.
But even though I enjoyed all of the food, I missed cooking. I have always liked to cook, but in the past couple of years, it has really become a passion of mine. I frequently spend all of Sunday afternoons in my kitchen, prepping and making my meals for the week, since I know I'm not going to have a lot of time for cooking after work. It's peaceful to me. I love the sounds of roasting vegetables in the oven and the crackling of hot oil in the skillet before you put your ingredients in. I like chopping vegetables...when I'm angry or frustrated at something it's a great way to expend energy and do something productive. I don't so much care about the eating part though, which is weird. Most of the time after I have spent hours cooking, I don't even want to eat anything I made and end up eating a sandwich for dinner. I love the prep more. But my favorite thing about cooking is watching other people enjoy my food. I'm a people pleaser by nature, but few things make me happier than cooking a delicious meal for friends and being with them while they enjoy it. I love planning menus for full meals or even just a tailgate dish. I seriously spend hours combing through recipes, tweaking them to make them my own, and counting down till I can make them. Living alone, I don't get the opportunity to cook for others as much as I'd like. I plan on changing this in 2014. I want to have friends over for dinner at least twice a month. I want to plan elaborate meals I'd never cook just for me (even though I have done that on occasion) and enjoy time with the people that mean the most to me.
People often ask me what are my favorite things to cook. I have listed my top 6 go-tos below. Let me know if you want the specific recipes, or if you want to come over and have me cook them for you! Seriously, I would be so excited if people wanted to invite themselves over!
1.) Scallops. I have mentioned before on this blog how much I love scallops, but they are my absolute favorite. They are delicious and you can do so many things with them. They seem very fancy, but require very little attention: two minutes on each side and they are done and ready to be consumed. Sometimes I'll just use salt & pepper and some lemon juice. Lovely. Other times I'll make a saffron sauce to serve with them. I was playing around in the kitchen one day and ended up creating a champagne cream sauce I served over pasta with scallops that I need to figure out how to make again. I really need to write things down more!
2.) Salmon. Seafood is my favorite, so I cook a lot of fish. I know it's more expensive than chicken, but it's what I like, so it's what I make. A simple rub of brown sugar and Dijon mustard is a great, quick, go-to recipe for work nights. Also, mixing grainy mustard and sour cream makes a great topping for your salmon. Rosemary is a great spice to use too, if you're looking for something different than the normal dill associated with salmon. Seriously, there are so many options for this yummy fish, and it's super good for you!
3.) Roasted vegetables. I make pans of roasted vegetables every week. Broccoli with lemon, asparagus, balsamic green beans & mushrooms, sriracha & honey brussel sprouts...YUM. Roasting is super easy, keeps the nutrients in the vegetables, and give the outside a crunch while cooking the inside to a comfort food temperature. I haven't found anything that I don't like to roast yet! Maybe I'll try eggplant next since I really want to like it, but haven't found a recipe I like yet.
4.) Homemade pasta. Yes, it's a lot of work. Yes, if you don't do certain things right you'll have a glob of basically playdough on your table. But, if you do it right, there are few things better. One of my goals in life is to be able to recreate my dad's lasagna that he would spend all day making. My mom won't be my guinea pig because she says it brings back hard memories, but I'm taking volunteers!
5.) Pad thai. I make the best pad thai I've ever had. I'm sorry, it's how I feel. There's a place downtown with good pad thai and of course, the Smiling Elephant is delicious, but I really feel like mine is just as good, if not better, and it's incredibly easy to make. I have trouble ordering it while I'm out, because it is so simple to make in my kitchen.
6.) Meatloaf. We were talking about this the other day in New Orleans: there are few ways to make meatloaf look appetizing. I mean, who hears the word 'loaf' and is like, man, that shit is going to be fancy?!?! But I actually really like it, and enjoy making it something people want to eat. I make buffalo chicken meatloaf with large chunks of bleu cheese and frank's red hot sauce. I also make a really good turkey and cranberry meatloaf that is really hearty and a great winter meal. I think I like making meatloaf so much because you can just thrown a lot of random ingredients in a bowl, mix together, and cook it. Chances are, if you know the ingredients you're putting in the bowl mix well, you'll have a tasty dinner.
I'm serious friends, let me know if you want to come over for dinner. I look forward to having many of you at my place soon for great food and some laughs!
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