What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

I'm writing this in an airport in the Middle of Nowhere, Midwest USA, sitting on an uncomfortable floor carpeted in what looks like the remnants of the old Roller Dome carpet from Hopkinsville.  Those of you I birthday-partied with for years know what I'm talking about. 

"What do you want to be when you grow up?" 

It's a question most of us will hear in our lifetime way too many times to count or for our liking.  The question changes some throughout the years.  It evolves into "What are you majoring in?"  "What are you going to do after graduation?"  "What do you mean you have a History degree...what do you do with that?"  Oh wait, was that just me? 

But the premise is always the same.  People are all up in your business about what you're going to do with your life and how successful you are going to be.  You say you're going to be a doctor?  People automatically think $$$$$$.  Unless you explain that no, you're actually going to be a Professor, but people have to call you Doctor.  But with a lot less money.  If you say teacher, people think what a kind hearted person you are to devote your life to educating our future.  Really, you're a masochist.  I'm the child of two teachers...I know.  I thought I would go through some of the career aspirations I have held over the years and reminisce about how my life could have turned out...

Age 3:  I really wanted to be a circus performer.  I watched 'Dumbo's Circus' on Disney all of the time and wanted to be Miss Lily, the tightrope walking cat.  I swear, the writer of most children's shows must be on LSD or something to come up with that.  In my 3 year old preschool class we did a circus performance and, of course, I walked the "tightrope"...which was actually a low to the ground balance beam my grandfather had constructed.  He also made me a bar I could swing from like a trapeze.  Oh yeah, I was the star of the show.  Especially when my feathered skirt came apart from my leotard and hung down behind me like a pink, feathery tail.  But hey, I was trying to embody a tightrope walking cat, so obviously I needed a tail. 

Age 4:  At this state in my life I was really into the color red.  So naturally, I wanted to be a fireman(woman) so I could drive around in a red truck.  However, my dislike for bing hot and wearing helmets eventually deterred me from this path.  I still really like firemen, though. 

Age 7:  At this age I was holding class every night with my stuffed animals and Barbie dolls and I really wanted to be a teacher.  This is also when mom started going gray, worrying I would follow in hers and dad's footsteps.  Don't get me wrong.  I, and my family, think teaching is a great profession...if they would actually let teachers teach instead of worrying about test scores, professional development, and budget cuts.  It's probably a good thing I changed my mind.  I really enjoyed hitting my students with my pointing stick and I'm pretty sure that is frowned upon nowadays in classrooms.

Age 10:  Okay, now I was in double digits and obviously I had my whole life figured out.  I decided I wanted to be a lawyer because that's what my mom had wanted to do, but never did.  My mother could fulfill her dreams through me (though not in a creepy Toddlers & Tiaras kind of way).  However, our dreams came to a shattering halt when I lost the 4th grade spelling bee on the word "campaign".  Obviously if I live up to my mother's Spelling Bee Championship then I couldn't follow her dream to be a lawyer.  At 10 1/2 I decided I wanted to be a judge, until I figured out you kind of have to be a lawyer first.  Fourth grade was a rough year. 

Age 12:  Now I wanted to be an astronaut.  I got a telescope for Christmas and my parents bought me a star (yes, like in "A Walk to Remember"...except I wasn't dying) and I would look at it every night.  I wanted to visit it someday.  It's amazing how many key details I left out of my job aspirations...such as, I would spontaneously combust if I got too close to my star.  Psh...details.

Age 13:  So by this time I discovered I wanted to lead a certain kind of lifestyle.  I wanted at least three cars, lots of fancy earrings, and an elevator in my house.  If I was going to afford these luxuries in life, I was going to have to make the big bucks.  So, I decided I wanted to be a doctor.  At first, I wanted to be a pediatrician, until I remembered how gross all of the little kids in my doctor's office waiting room were.  Then I decided to pass.  I don't really like germs or blood, so I decided to be an orthopedic surgeon.  I'd just fix bones all day.  Needless to say, I ignored the important word "surgeon."  There is no surgery without blood. 

Ages 14-17:  This point in my life was kind of a blur.  I was in my own little high school world and didn't really think about what I was going to be when I grew up.  I went to school, read, and babysat on the weekends, and could not have been happier.  I also had things like Prom to worry about, so obviously my future career took a backseat to what kind of flowers would look best with my dress.

Age 18-...well, 18:  So it was Senior Year.  It was time to really buckle down and decide what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I was always very active in church and I loved children, so when my mom suggested I be a children's minister I was like...YES.  That is what I'm going to be.  I wrote convincing college essays, got into my #1 college choice with a scholarship, and knew I was on my way.  Well, at least until I actually got to college.

Age 19-22:  It's amazing how an institution that you have to basically beg and plead to let you into by describing, in detail, what you want to do with your life, can make you do a complete 180, sending you into the opposite direction.  Originally I came in with a Religion major and a History minor.  All that changed when my religious views drastically changed.  I began to question things I had been taught all of my life and completely re-evaluated where I stood in my faith.  I am still figuring out my way, but rest assured, I am not a heathen and I still love Jesus.  However, I knew I didn't want to be a children's minister anymore.  Thankfully, I found my new path in one of my History minor classes.  Belmont University has a fantastic history faculty.  I loved my course work and was lucky to have close relationships to several professors.  I can't speak high enough of my academic upbringing at Belmont and am so grateful to each professor for what they taught me.  Okay, I thought...I had finally found where I fit in in the world...I'm going to be a History Professor.

Age 22-23:  So, I applied to the History graduate program at the University of Kentucky.  Not only would I get to study what I love, but I could finally go to UK basketball games regularly.  What was there not to like?!?!  Well, turns out, there wasn't much TO like.  I never really felt 100% like I was in the right place.  My professors and friends were wonderful, but it was clear to me this was not what I was supposed to be doing.  And, this was during the Billy Clyde years, so the basketball team wasn't even good.  I made the decision not to return for my second year, and as fate would have it, I got my former job back!

Age 23-25:  Before I left for UK I had been working for the First Lady of Tennessee for about a year and a half.  I was involved in fundraisers for the Tennessee Residence and child advocacy centers, gave tours of the Tennessee Residence, helped with archiving projects, and assited her with her speaking engagements and presentations...basically the best first job ever.  I came back to work for her until December of 2010, two weeks before their term was up.  My greatest accomplishment was helping establish a speaker's series that was free, open to the public, and consisted of relevant topics such as Black History Month, Local Farming, and Tennessee music.  Richard Dreyfuss (you know, from JAWS!) actually participated in one of the series.  My favorite one, however, was a gubernatorial debate held between the Republican and Democratic party candidates.  The audience consisted of all highschools, who would be voting for the first time in the election.  We had community leaders work with the students to develop questions to ask the candidates.  It was one of my proudest moments.

Age 25-26:  After I left that job, I went to work in the non-profit world.  I learned a lot and made some great friends, but found the work wasn't for me.  I'd love to volunteer with nonprofits at some point, but I missed the pace of government.

Age 27:  So, somehow, a History major ended up working in the Tennessee Department of Revenue.  I have a wonderful boss, supportive co-workers, and the opportunity to grow and expand my skills.  I couldn't be happier at my job.  Will this be my permanent career?  Who the hell knows.  But, for right now, it's the place I am supposed to, and want to, be.

So if you're 27 (or older!) and don't have it all figured out yet, don't worry!  You never know where you'll end up.  I mean, I took one math class my first semester of college (Basic Concepts of Mathematics) because I figured as a Religion/History major the only numbers I would need to know were years.  And now I work with a lot of numbers.  Oh, little did I know...

Whew...this was a long one.  One person who reads this blog said they really liked my writing and I should do it full time...maybe that will be Age 29 and beyond?  Or hey...it's never too late to join the circus!