Whew, over 1000 pageviews...crazy. I hope that means that some of you out there actually enjoy what I write and that I don't have some sort of crazy stalker that does nothing but refresh this blog all the time. So to those of you who enjoy what I write, thank you. And to the stalker...are you single? Kidding.
Okay, so now that I have been thinking about it, I left a few people off the original post, so I thought I would add five more people you typically see in Nashville on a Saturday night. Since it's about 2:15 a.m. on Saturday/Sunday, I have fresh material. So buckle in, sip on some coffee, and enjoy!
1.) The girl who plays "mom"...better known as the c***blocker. This is the girl in the group (usually the one with the least alcohol in their bloodstream) that decides they are on a mission to save their girlfriends from hooking up that night. She is fiercely protective of her posse, much like a doberman with curls. If she sees her friend being escorted out of a bar by a stranger, she has no problem knocking into people and spilling a few drinks to prevent her friend from making a mistake. Most of the time, they should just let their friends go on their merry ways and mind their own business. But, every once in a while, the c***block is needed. The best example I have ever seen happened last year at my friend S's birthday. This guy kept trying to kiss S and she was completely oblivious. My friend K and I didn't like this guy, and knew S didn't either, so when we saw him go in for the kill once again K yelled "SW SHOTS!" S turned her head just in time and met us at the bar. The guy just stood there, quite bewildered. The difference in this situation is that we knew beforehand she didn't want anything to happen with this guy and we were prepared. We were genuinely trying to help our friend, and not just blocking a friend from making out with someone for a while. Because you know, the "mom" is probably just jealous she has to go home by herself.
2.) The person who does not want to be there.
I've been this person several times. You have to be in a certain mindset to enjoy the downtown honkey tonks and if you're not there, you're not going to get there. It's best to just go home. You can recognize this person by seeing how much time they spend on their phone, the disgusted/superior looks they give to everyone at the bar, and the circle of space other bar patrons give them. No one wants to stand next to a negative Nancy. If this is you, just leave. Or don't go out in the first place if you know you're not going to have fun. Do what my friend C and I do: go to Sunset Grille and get nachos. You will be a much happier person for it.
3.) The way overdressed girl.
Whoa, did we see one tonight. I was at a house party/pregame with C and this girl walked in. Skintight, short black dress (I'm not the thinnest person in the world, but at least I know what size clothes I wear. This girl obviously did not), hair curled into intricate waves that you know she spent a ton of time on, black stiletto heels (really? really? You know those things are NOT comfortable no matter how many times you try and tell yourself that) and lots of makeup. C's reaction was, "Well, that was a choice." Mine was to call her The Playmate the rest of the night. Yes honey, everyone is looking at you, and I know that was your goal, but maybe you should re-think that. Having everyone stare at you is not always a good thing.
4.) The Token Hipster
We saw this guy tonight too. We walked into the house party (where most people were dressed in the school colors of the college they support or comfortable dresses and cowboy boots) and then you had the one guy in girl's jeans, sneakers, with strategically tousled hair. One of these things is not like the other. You wonder how this person fits in with everyone else. Is he trying to stand out from the crowd? Or did he just buy real estate in the wrong part of town and now he's too far from his people in East Nashville? It's a mystery.
5.) The Northface guy
You know you've seen him. Even though he's inside, in a house or crowded bar, he is still wearing his damn Northface, completey zipped up. Um, it's freaking HOT. Take off your damn jacket! You probably have on a polo with your collar popped underneath, and that's okay. Or maybe even your fraternity letters. Again, that's totally okay. But good God, when you are in a bar at 1 a.m. and have been dancing and drinking for hours and you're sweating profusely, you would be doing yourself a huge favor to just take the damn coat off. Most people have them. They are no longer status symbols. Plus, you have to wash them the next day because they smell like stale smoke, the tator tots you ate before you hopped in the cab, and disappointment. Ew.
Okay all, hope you enjoyed the second installment. Maybe there will be a third...it just depends who I see out next!
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